Truth and Beauty

I finished reading "Truth and Beauty" by Ann Patchett this weekend, and I was disappointed by it -- but oddly inspired. Maybe I went into it with a prejudice. I didn't like the title -- I thought that perhaps Patchett was calling herself Beauty to Lucy Grealy's Truth. Lucy Grealy, who died about 3 years ago of an accidental heroin overdose, was a poet and a writer. Her most famous book, Autobiography of a Face, tells of her difficult life after she lost nearly all of her lower jaw to cancer as a child. Despite many attempts to regrow bone there, no sugeries worked, and her face was misshapen and scarred. So, I thought, how vain of Patchett to use this title in her book about her friendship with Grealy. Was she calling herself Beauty to Grealy's Truth?

Unfortunately, I wasn't that far off the mark. The book is about how good Patchett was to Grealy. How she cared for her. How she paid Grealy's bills or ran to her when ever Grealy wanted. It's about how Patchett knew Grealy would die from heroin. Patchett makes the analogy of her being the ant to Grealy's grasshopper (rent A Bug's Life... it's better), but I think she also was glorifying herself.

Coincidently, moments after finishing the book, I read an essay Patchett wrote for either Real Simple or 0 (Oprah's magazine) about beauty. (NB: We were returning from a weekend trip to Delaware, counting the cars on the New Jersey Turnpike as it were, and I had a pile of magazines and books with me and don't recall which magazine it was in. So, it truly was a coincidence -- or a moment of synchronicity -- to finish one and then find the other.)

In the essay Patchett wrote about how ideals of beauty differ by state. She's lived in many parts of the country and said she never felt really beautiful until she lived in Montana, where she could be her natural self. Uh-huh. OK.

Here's where the inspiration comes: My mind traveled from beauty to narcissism to creativity. And I think that the last two are closely related. There's a belief that the greatest creative minds are somewhat depressed and that imbalance enhances their creativity. Here's another thought: Those with great creativy must be somewhat vain, while also being incredibly self-conscious (same thing?). It takes a certain about of belief in yourself, hampered by overarching doubt at other times, to transfer ideas and thoughts to writing and painting and music. (Remember, paranoia and vanity are two sides of the same coin.)

(Talk about narcissism: I believe Oprah has appeared on every cover of her magazine. That's at least 60 issues. Does she do it because she believes only her face can sell the magazine? Because that's what the advertisers want? Because she likes seeing her face on the cover?)

I had hoped to discuss what makes a person beautiful. But now I want to hear thoughts on creativity.